One thing was certain, that
the white kitten had had
nothing to do with it: -- it
was the black kitten's fault
entirely. For the white kitten
had been having its face washed
by the old cat for the last quarter
of an hour (and bearing it pretty
well, considering); so you see
that it couldn't have
had any hand in
the mischief.
The way Dinah washed her children's
faces was this: first she held
the poor thing down by its ear
with one paw, and then with the
other paw she rubbed its face
all over, the wrong way, beginning
at the nose: and just now, as
I said, she was hard at work
on the white kitten, which was
lying quite still and trying
to purr -- no doubt feeling that
it was all meant for its good.
But the black kitten had been
finished with earlier in the
afternoon, and so, while Alice
was sitting curled up in a corner
of the great arm-chair, half
talking to herself and half asleep,
the kitten had been having a
grand game of romps with the
ball of worsted Alice had been
trying to wind up, and had been
rolling it up and down till it
had all come undone again; and
there it was, spread over the
hearth-rug, all knots and tangles,
with the kitten running after
its own tail in the middle.
`Oh, you wicked little thing!'
cried Alice, catching up the
kitten, and giving it a little
kiss to make it understand that
it was in disgrace. `Really,
Dinah ought to have taught you
better manners! You ought,
Dinah, you know you ought!' she
added, looking reproachfully
at the old cat, and speaking
in as cross a voice as she could
manage -- and then she scrambled
back into the arm-chair, taking
the kitten and the worsted with
her, and began winding up the
ball again. But she didn't get
on very fast, as she was talking
all the time, sometimes to the
kitten, and sometimes to herself.
Kitty sat very demurely on her
knee, pretending to watch the
progress of the winding, and
now and then putting out one
paw and gently touching the ball,
as if it would be glad to help,
if it might.
`Do you know what to-morrow
is, Kitty?' Alice began. `You'd
have guessed if you'd been up
in the window with me -- only
Dinah was making you tidy, so
you couldn't. I was watching
the boys getting in stick for
the bonfire -- and it wants plenty
of sticks, Kitty! Only it got
so cold, and it snowed so, they
had to leave off. Never mind,
Kitty, we'll go and see the bonfire
to-morrow.' Here Alice wound
two or three turns of the worsted
round the kitten's neck, just
to see how it would look: this
led to a scramble, in which the
ball rolled down upon the floor,
and yards and yards of it got
unwound again.
`Do you know, I was so angry,
Kitty,' Alice went on as soon
as they were comfortably settled
again, `when I saw all the mischief
you had been doing, I was very
nearly opening the window, and
putting you out into the snow!
And you'd have deserved it, you
little mischievous darling! What
have you got to say for yourself?
Now don't interrupt me!' she
went on, holding up one finger.
`I'm going to tell you all your
faults. Number one: you squeaked
twice while Dinah was washing
your face this morning. Now you
can't deny it, Kitty: I heard
you! What that you say?' (pretending
that the kitten was speaking.)
`Her paw went into your eye?
Well, that's your fault,
for keeping your eyes open --
if you'd shut them tight up,
it wouldn't have happened. Now
don't make any more excuses,
but listen! Number two: you pulled
Snowdrop away by the tail just
as I had put down the saucer
of milk before her! What, you
were thirsty, were you?
How do you know she wasn't
thirsty too? Now for number three:
you unwound every bit of the
worsted while I wasn't looking!
`That's three faults, Kitty,
and you've not been punished
for any of them yet. You know
I'm saving up all your punishments
for Wednesday week -- Suppose
they had saved up all my punishments!'
she went on, talking more to
herself than the kitten. `What would they
do at the end of a year? I should
be sent to prison, I suppose,
when the day came. Or -- let
me see -- suppose each punishment
was to be going without a dinner:
then, when the miserable day
came, I should have to go without
fifty dinners at once! Well,
I shouldn't mind that much!
I'd far rather go without them
than eat them!
`Do you hear the snow against
the window-panes, Kitty? How
nice and soft it sounds! Just
as if some one was kissing the
window all over outside. I wonder
if the snow loves the
trees and fields, that it kisses
them so gently? And then it covers
them up snug, you know, with
a white quilt; and perhaps it
says, "Go to sleep, darlings,
till the summer comes again." And
when they wake up in the summer,
Kitty, they dress themselves
all in green, and dance about
-- whenever the wind blows --
oh, that's very pretty!' cried
Alice, dropping the ball of worsted
to clap her hands. `And I do
so wish it was true! I'm
sure the woods look sleepy in
the autumn, when the leaves are
getting brown.
`Kitty, can
you play chess? Now, don't
smile, my dear, I'm
asking it seriously. Because,
when we were playing just now,
you watched just as if you understood
it: and when I said "Check!" you
purred! Well, it was a
nice check, Kitty, and really
I might have won, if it hadn't
been for that nasty Knight, that
came wiggling down among my pieces.
Kitty, dear, let's pretend --
' And here I wish I could tell
you half the things Alice used
to say, beginning with her favourite
phrase `Let's pretend.' She had
had quite a long argument with
her sister only the say before
-- all because Alice had begun
with `Let's pretend we're kings
and queens;' and her sister,
who liked being very exact, had
argued that they couldn't, because
there were only two of them,
and Alice had been reduced at
last to say, `Well, you can
be one of them then, and I'll be
all the rest." And once she had
really frightened her old nurse
by shouting suddenly in her ear,
`Nurse!
Do let's pretend that I'm a
hungry hyaena, and you're a bone.'
But this is taking us away
from Alice's speech to the kitten.
`Let's pretend that you're the
Red Queen, Kitty! Do you know,
I think if you sat up and folded
your arms, you'd look exactly
like her. Now do try, there's
a dear!' And Alice got the Red
Queen off the table, and set
it up before the kitten as a
model for it to imitate: however,
the thing didn't succeed, principally,
Alice said, because the kitten
wouldn't fold its arms properly.
So, to punish it, she held it
up to the Looking-glass, that
it might see how sulky it was
-- `and if you're not good directly,'
she added, `I'll put you through
into Looking-glass House. How
would you like that?'
`Now, if you'll only attend,
Kitty, and not talk so much,
I'll tell you all my ideas about
Looking-glass House. First, there's
the room you can see through
the glass -- that's just the
same as our drawing room, only
the things go the other way.
I can see all of it when I get
upon a chair -- all but the bit
behind the fireplace. Oh! I do
so wish I could see that bit!
I want so much to know whether
they've a fire in the winter:
you never can tell, you
know, unless our fire smokes,
and then smoke comes up in that
room too -- but that may be only
pretence, just to make it look
as if they had a fire. Well then,
the books are something like
our books, only the words go
the wrong way; I know that, because
I've held up one of our books
to the glass, and then they hold
up one in the other room.
`How would you like to live
in Looking-glass House, Kitty?
I wonder if they'd give you milk
in there? Perhaps Looking-glass
milk isn't good to drink -- But
oh, Kitty! now we come to the
passage. You can just see a little peep of
the passage in Looking-glass
House, if you leave the door
of our drawing-room wide open:
and it's very like our passage
as far as you can see, only you
know it may be quite different
on beyond. Oh, Kitty! how nice
it would be if we could only
get through into Looking- glass
House! I'm sure it's got, oh!
such beautiful things in it!
Let's pretend there's a way
of getting through into it, somehow,
Kitty. Let's pretend the glass
has got all soft like gauze,
so that we can get through. Why,
it's turning into a sort of mist
now, I declare! It'll be easy
enough to get through -- ' She
was up on the chimney-piece while
she said this, though she hardly
knew how she had got there. And
certainly the glass was beginning
to melt away, just like a bright
silvery mist.
In another moment Alice was
through the glass, and had jumped
lightly down into the Looking-glass
room. The very first thing she
did was to look whether there
was a fire in the fireplace,
and she was quite pleased to
find that there was a real one,
blazing away as brightly as the
one she had left behind. `So
I shall be as warm here as I
was in the old room,' thought
Alice: `warmer, in fact, because
there'll be no one here to scold
me away from the fire. Oh, what
fun it'll be, when they see me
through the glass in here, and
can't get at me!'
Then she began looking about,
and noticed that what could be
seen from the old room was quite
common and uninteresting, but
that all the rest was a different
as possible. For instance, the
pictures on the wall next the
fire seemed to be all alive,
and the very clock on the chimney-piece
(you know you can only see the
back of it in the Looking-glass)
had got the face of a little
old man, and grinned at her.
`They don't keep this room
so tidy as the other,' Alice
thought to herself, as she noticed
several of the chessmen down
in the hearth among the cinders:
but in another moment, with a
little `Oh!' of surprise, she
was down on her hands and knees
watching them. The chessmen were
walking about, two and two!
`Here are the Red King and
the Red Queen,' Alice said (in
a whisper, for fear of frightening
them), `and there are the White
King and the White Queen sitting
on the edge of the shovel --
and here are two castles walking
arm in arm -- I don't think they
can hear me,' she went on, as
she put her head closer down,
`and I'm nearly sure they can't
see me. I feel somehow as if
I were invisible -- '
Here something began squeaking
on the table behind Alice, and
made her turn her head just in
time to see one of the White
Pawns roll over and begin kicking:
she watched it with great curiosity
to see what would happen next.
`It is the voice of my child!'
the White Queen cried out as
she rushed past the King, so
violently that she knocked him
over among the cinders. `My precious
Lily! My imperial kitten!' and
she began scrambling wildly up
the side of the fender.
`Imperial fiddlestick!' said
the King, rubbing his nose, which
had been hurt by the fall. He
had a right to be a little annoyed
with the Queen, for he was covered
with ashes from head to foot.
Alice was very anxious to be
of use, and, as the poor little
Lily was nearly screaming herself
into a fit, she hastily picked
up the Queen and set her on the
table by the side of her noisy
little daughter.
The Queen gasped, and sat down:
the rapid journey through the
air had quite taken away her
breath and for a minute or two
she could do nothing but hug
the little Lily in silence. As
soon as she had recovered her
breath a little, she called out
to the White King, who was sitting
sulkily among the ashes, `Mind
the volcano!'
`What volcano?' said the King,
looking up anxiously into the
fire, as if he thought that was
the most likely place to find
one.
`Blew -- me -- up,' panted
the Queen, who was still a little
out of breath. `Mind you come
up -- the regular way -- don't
get blown up!'
Alice watched the White King
as he slowly struggled up from
bar to bar, till at last she
said, `Why, you'll be hours and
hours getting to the table, at
that rate. I'd far better help
you, hadn't I?' But the King
took no notice of the question:
it was quite clear that he could
neither hear her nor see her.
So Alice picked him up very
gently, and lifted him across
more slowly than she had lifted
the Queen, that she mightn't
take his breath away: but, before
she put him on the table, she
thought she might as well dust
him a little, he was so covered
with ashes.
She said afterwards that she
had never seen in all her life
such a face as the King made,
when he found himself held in
the air by an invisible hand,
and being dusted: he was far
too much astonished to cry out,
but his eyes and his mouth went
on getting larger and larger,
and rounder and rounder, till
her hand shook so with laughing
that she nearly let him drop
upon the floor.
`Oh! Please don't make
such faces, my dear!' she cried
out, quite forgetting that the
King couldn't hear her. `You
make me laugh so that I can hardly
hold you! And don't keep your
mouth so wide open! All the ashes
will get into it -- there, now
I think you're tidy enough!'
she added, as she smoothed his
hair, and set him upon the table
near the Queen.
The King immediately fell flat
on his back, and lay perfectly
still: and Alice was a little
alarmed at what she had done,
and went round the room to see
if she could find any water to
throw over him. However, she
could find nothing but a bottle
of ink, and when she got back
with it she found he had recovered,
and he and the Queen were talking
together in a frightened whisper
-- so low, that Alice could hardly
hear what they said.
The King was saying, `I assure,
you my dear, I turned cold to
the very ends of my whiskers!'
To which the Queen replied,
`You haven't got any whiskers.'
`The horror of that moment,'
the King went on, `I shall never, never forget!'
`You will, though,' the Queen
said, `if you don't make a memorandum
of it.'
Alice looked on with great
interest as the King took an
enormous memorandum-book out
of his pocket, and began writing.
A sudden thought struck her,
and she took hold of the end
of the pencil, which came some
way over his shoulder, and began
writing for him.
The poor King look puzzled
and unhappy, and struggled with
the pencil for some time without
saying anything; but Alice was
too strong for him, and at last
he panted out, `My dear! I really must get
a thinner pencil. I can't manage
this one a bit; it writes all
manner of things that I don't
intend -- '
`What manner of things?' said
the Queen, looking over the book
(in which Alice had put `the
white knight is sliding down
the poker. he balances very badly')
`That's not a memorandum of your feelings!'
There was a book lying near
Alice on the table, and while
she sat watching the White King
(for she was still a little anxious
about him, and had the ink all
ready to throw over him, in case
he fainted again), she turned
over the leaves, to find some
part that she could read, ` --
for it's all in some language
I don't know,' she said to herself.
It was like this.
YKCOWREBBAJ
sevot yhtils eht dna
,gillirb sawT`
ebaw eht ni elbmig dna eryg diD
,sevogorob eht erew ysmim llA
.ebargtuo shtar emom eht dnA
She puzzled
over this for some time, but
at last a bright thought
struck her. `Why, it's a Looking-glass
book, of course! And if I hold
it up to a glass, the words will
all go the right way again."
This was the poem that Alice
read.
JABBERWOCKY.
`Twas brillig, and the
slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
`Beware the Jabberwock,
my son!
The jaws that bite, the claws that catch!
Beware the Jubjub bird, and shun
The frumious Bandersnatch!'
He took his vorpal sword
in hand:
Long time the manxome foe he sought --
So rested he by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.
And as in uffish thought
he stood,
The Jabberwock, with eyes of flame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as it came!
One, two! One, two!
And through and through
The vorpal blade went snicker-snack!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went galumphing back.
`And has thou slain
the Jabberwock?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!
He chortled in his joy.
`Twas brillig, and the
slithy toves
Did gyre and gimble in the wabe;
All mimsy were the borogoves,
And the mome raths outgrabe.
`It seems very pretty,' she
said when she had finished it,
`but it's rather hard
to understand!' (You see she
didn't like to confess, ever
to herself, that she couldn't
make it out at all.) `Somehow
it seems to fill my head with
ideas -- only I don't exactly
know what they are! However, somebody killed something:
that's clear, at any rate --
'
`But oh!' thought Alice, suddenly
jumping up, `if I don't make
haste I shall have to go back
through the Looking-glass, before
I've seen what the rest of the
house is like! Let's have a look
at the garden first!' She was
out of the room in a moment,
and ran down stairs -- or, at
least, it wasn't exactly running,
but a new invention of hers for
getting down stairs quickly and
easily, as Alice said to herself.
She just kept the tips of her
fingers on the hand-rail, and
floated gently down without even
touching the stairs with her
feet; then she floated on through
the hall, and would have gone
straight out at the door in the
same way, if she hadn't caught
hold of the door-post. She was
getting a little giddy with so
much floating in the air, and
was rather glad to find herself
walking again in the natural
way.
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