So
the First Pair went forth from
the Garden under a curse --
a permanent one. They had lost
every pleasure they had possessed
before "The Fall"; and yet
they were rich, for they had
gained one worth all the rest:
they knew the Supreme Art.
They
practiced it diligently and
were filled with contentment.
The Deity ordered them to practice
it. They obeyed, this time.
But it was just as well it
was not forbidden, for they
would have practiced it anyhow,
if a thousand Deities had forbidden
it.
Results
followed. By the name of Cain
and Abel. And these had some
sisters; and knew what to do
with them. And so there were
some more results: Cain and
Abel begot some nephews and
nieces. These, in their turn,
begot some second cousins.
At this point classification
of relationships began to get
difficult, and the attempt
to keep it up was abandoned.
The
pleasant labor of populating
the world went on from age
to age, and with prime efficiency;
for in those happy days the
sexes were still competent
for the Supreme Art when by
rights they ought to have been
dead eight hundred years. The
sweeter sex, the dearer sex,
the lovelier sex was manifestly
at its very best, then, for
it was even able to attract
gods. Real gods. They came
down out of heaven and had
wonderful times with those
hot young blossoms. The Bible
tells about it.
By
help of those visiting foreigners
the population grew and grew
until it numbered several millions.
But it was a disappointment
to the Deity. He was dissatisfied
with its morals; which in some
respects were not any better
than his own. Indeed they were
an unflatteringly close imitation
of his own. They were a very
bad people, and as he knew
of no way to reform them, he
wisely concluded to abolish
them. This is the only really
enlightened and superior idea
his Bible has credited him
with, and it would have made
his reputation for all time
if he could only have kept
to it and carried it out. But
he was always unstable -- except
in his advertisements -- and
his good resolution broke down.
He took a pride in man; man
was his finest invention; man
was his pet, after the housefly,
and he could not bear to lose
him wholly; so he finally decided
to save a sample of him and
drown the rest.
Nothing
could be more characteristic
of him. He created all those
infamous people, and he alone
was responsible for their conduct.
Not one of them deserved death,
yet it was certainly good policy
to extinguish them; especially
since in creating them the
master crime had already been
committed, and to allow them
to go on procreating would
be a distinct addition to the
crime. But at the same time
there could be no justice,
no fairness, in any favoritism
-- all should be drowned or
none.
No,
he would not have it so; he
would save half a dozen and
try the race over again. He
was not able to foresee that
it would go rotten again, for
he is only the Far-Sighted
One in his advertisements.
He
saved out Noah and his family,
and arranged to exterminate
the rest. He planned an Ark,
and Noah built it. Neither
of them had ever built an Ark
before, nor knew anything about
Arks; and so something out
of the common was to be expected.
It happened. Noah was a farmer,
and although he knew what was
required of the Ark he was
quite incompetent to say whether
this one would be large enough
to meet the requirements or
not (which it wasn't), so he
ventured no advice. The Deity
did not know it wasn't large
enough, but took the chances
and made no adequate measurements.
In the end the ship fell far
short of the necessities, and
to this day the world still
suffers for it.
Noah
built the Ark. He built it
the best he could, but left
out most of the essentials.
It had no rudder, it had no
sails, it had no compass, it
had no pumps, it had no charts,
no lead-lines, no anchors,
no log, no light, no ventilation,
and as for cargo room -- which
was the main thing -- the less
said about that the better.
It was to be at sea eleven
months, and would need fresh
water enough to fill two Arks
of its size -- yet the additional
Ark was not provided. Water
from outside could not be utilized:
half of it would be salt water,
and men and land animals could
not drink it.
For
not only was a sample of man
to be saved, but business samples
of the other animals, too.
You must understand that when
Adam ate the apple in the Garden
and learned how to multiply
and replenish, the other animals
learned the Art, too, by watching
Adam. It was cunning of them,
it was neat; for they got all
that was worth having out of
the apple without tasting it
and afflicting themselves with
the disastrous Moral Sense,
the parent of all immoralities. |