IN the morning we went up to
the village and bought a wire
rat-trap and fetched it down,
and unstopped the best rat-hole,
and in about an hour we had fifteen
of the bulliest kind of ones;
and then we took it and put it
in a safe place under Aunt Sally's
bed. But while we was gone for
spiders little Thomas Franklin
Benjamin Jefferson Elexander
Phelps found it there, and opened
the door of it to see if the
rats would come out, and they
did; and Aunt Sally she come
in, and when we got back she
was a-standing on top of the
bed raising Cain, and the rats
was doing what they could to
keep off the dull times for her.
So she took and dusted us both
with the hickry, and we was as
much as two hours catching another
fifteen or sixteen, drat that
meddlesome cub, and they warn't
the likeliest, nuther, because
the first haul was the pick of
the flock. I never see a likelier
lot of rats than what that first
haul was.
We got a splendid stock of
sorted spiders, and bugs, and
frogs, and caterpillars, and
one thing or another; and we
like to got a hornet's nest,
but we didn't. The family was
at home. We didn't give it right
up, but stayed with them as long
as we could; because we allowed
we'd tire them out or they'd
got to tire us out, and they
done it. Then we got allycumpain
and rubbed on the places, and
was pretty near all right again,
but couldn't set down convenient.
And so we went for the snakes,
and grabbed a couple of dozen
garters and house-snakes, and
put them in a bag, and put it
in our room, and by that time
it was suppertime, and a rattling
good honest day's work: and hungry?
-- oh, no, I reckon not! And
there warn't a blessed snake
up there when we went back --
we didn't half tie the sack,
and they worked out somehow,
and left. But it didn't matter
much, because they was still
on the premises somewheres. So
we judged we could get some of
them again. No, there warn't
no real scarcity of snakes about
the house for a considerable
spell. You'd see them dripping
from the rafters and places every
now and then; and they generly
landed in your plate, or down
the back of your neck, and most
of the time where you didn't
want them. Well, they was handsome
and striped, and there warn't
no harm in a million of them;
but that never made no difference
to Aunt Sally; she despised snakes,
be the breed what they might,
and she couldn't stand them no
way you could fix it; and every
time one of them flopped down
on her, it didn't make no difference
what she was doing, she would
just lay that work down and light
out. I never see such a woman.
And you could hear her whoop
to Jericho. You couldn't get
her to take a-holt of one of
them with the tongs. And if she
turned over and found one in
bed she would scramble out and
lift a howl that you would think
the house was afire. She disturbed
the old man so that he said he
could most wish there hadn't
ever been no snakes created.
Why, after every last snake had
been gone clear out of the house
for as much as a week Aunt Sally
warn't over it yet; she warn't
near over it; when she was setting
thinking about something you
could touch her on the back of
her neck with a feather and she
would jump right out of her stockings.
It was very curious. But Tom
said all women was just so. He
said they was made that way for
some reason or other.
We got a licking every time
one of our snakes come in her
way, and she allowed these lickings
warn't nothing to what she would
do if we ever loaded up the place
again with them. I didn't mind
the lickings, because they didn't
amount to nothing; but I minded
the trouble we had to lay in
another lot. But we got them
laid in, and all the other things;
and you never see a cabin as
blithesome as Jim's was when
they'd all swarm out for music
and go for him. Jim didn't like
the spiders, and the spiders
didn't like Jim; and so they'd
lay for him, and make it mighty
warm for him. And he said that
between the rats and the snakes
and the grindstone there warn't
no room in bed for him, skasely;
and when there was, a body couldn't
sleep, it was so lively, and
it was always lively, he said,
because THEY never all slept
at one time, but took turn about,
so when the snakes was asleep
the rats was on deck, and when
the rats turned in the snakes
come on watch, so he always had
one gang under him, in his way,
and t'other gang having a circus
over him, and if he got up to
hunt a new place the spiders
would take a chance at him as
he crossed over. He said if he
ever got out this time he wouldn't
ever be a prisoner again, not
for a salary.
Well, by the end of three weeks
everything was in pretty good
shape. The shirt was sent in
early, in a pie, and every time
a rat bit Jim he would get up
and write a little in his journal
whilst the ink was fresh; the
pens was made, the inscriptions
and so on was all carved on the
grindstone; the bed-leg was sawed
in two, and we had et up the
sawdust, and it give us a most
amazing stomach-ache. We reckoned
we was all going to die, but
didn't. It was the most undigestible
sawdust I ever see; and Tom said
the same. But as I was saying,
we'd got all the work done now,
at last; and we was all pretty
much fagged out, too, but mainly
Jim. The old man had wrote a
couple of times to the plantation
below Orleans to come and get
their runaway nigger, but hadn't
got no answer, because there
warn't no such plantation; so
he allowed he would advertise
Jim in the St. Louis and New
Orleans papers; and when he mentioned
the St. Louis ones it give me
the cold shivers, and I see we
hadn't no time to lose. So Tom
said, now for the nonnamous letters.
"What's them?" I
says.
"Warnings to
the people that something is
up. Sometimes it's
done one way, sometimes another.
But there's always somebody spying
around that gives notice to the
governor of the castle. When
Louis XVI. was going to light
out of the Tooleries a servantgirl
done it. It's a very good way,
and so is the nonnamous letters.
We'll use them both. And it's
usual for the prisoner's mother
to change clothes with him, and
she stays in, and he slides out
in her clothes. We'll do that,
too."
"But looky
here, Tom, what do we want
to WARN anybody for
that something's up? Let them
find it out for themselves --
it's their lookout."
"Yes, I know;
but you can't depend on them.
It's the way
they've acted from the very start
-- left us to do EVERYTHING.
They're so confiding and mulletheaded
they don't take notice of nothing
at all. So if we don't GIVE them
notice there won't be nobody
nor nothing to interfere with
us, and so after all our hard
work and trouble this escape
'll go off perfectly flat; won't
amount to nothing -- won't be
nothing TO it."
"Well, as for
me, Tom, that's the way I'd
like."
"Shucks!" he
says, and looked disgusted.
So I says:
"But I ain't
going to make no complaint.
Any way that suits
you suits me. What you going
to do about the servant-girl?"
"You'll be
her. You slide in, in the middle
of the night, and
hook that yaller girl's frock."
"Why, Tom,
that 'll make trouble next
morning; because, of course,
she prob'bly hain't got any but
that one."
"I know; but
you don't want it but fifteen
minutes, to carry
the nonnamous letter and shove
it under the front door."
"All right,
then, I'll do it; but I could
carry it just as
handy in my own togs."
"You wouldn't
look like a servant-girl THEN,
would you?"
"No, but there
won't be nobody to see what
I look like, ANYWAY."
"That ain't
got nothing to do with it.
The thing for us
to do is just to do our DUTY,
and not worry about whether anybody
SEES us do it or not. Hain't
you got no principle at all?"
"All right,
I ain't saying nothing; I'm
the servantgirl.
Who's Jim's mother?"
"I'm his mother.
I'll hook a gown from Aunt
Sally."
"Well, then,
you'll have to stay in the
cabin when me and
Jim leaves."
"Not much.
I'll stuff Jim's clothes full
of straw and lay
it on his bed to represent his
mother in disguise, and Jim 'll
take the nigger woman's gown
off of me and wear it, and we'll
all evade together. When a prisoner
of style escapes it's called
an evasion. It's always called
so when a king escapes, f'rinstance.
And the same with a king's son;
it don't make no difference whether
he's a natural one or an unnatural
one."
So Tom he wrote the nonnamous
letter, and I smouched the yaller
wench's frock that night, and
put it on, and shoved it under
the front door, the way Tom told
me to. It said:
Beware. Trouble is brewing.
Keep a sharp lookout. UNKNOWN
FRIEND.
Next night
we stuck a picture, which Tom
drawed in blood, of
a skull and crossbones on the
front door; and next night another
one of a coffin on the back door.
I never see a family in such
a sweat. They couldn't a been
worse scared if the place had
a been full of ghosts laying
for them behind everything and
under the beds and shivering
through the air. If a door banged,
Aunt Sally she jumped and said "ouch!" if
anything fell, she jumped and
said "ouch!" if you happened
to touch her, when she warn't
noticing, she done the same;
she couldn't face noway and be
satisfied, because she allowed
there was something behind her
every time -- so she was always
a-whirling around sudden, and
saying "ouch," and before she'd
got two-thirds around she'd whirl
back again, and say it again;
and she was afraid to go to bed,
but she dasn't set up. So the
thing was working very well,
Tom said; he said he never see
a thing work more satisfactory.
He said it showed it was done
right.
So he said, now for the grand
bulge! So the very next morning
at the streak of dawn we got
another letter ready, and was
wondering what we better do with
it, because we heard them say
at supper they was going to have
a nigger on watch at both doors
all night. Tom he went down the
lightning-rod to spy around;
and the nigger at the back door
was asleep, and he stuck it in
the back of his neck and come
back. This letter said:
Don't betray me, I wish to
be your friend. There is a desprate
gang of cut-throats from over
in the Indian Territory going
to steal your runaway nigger
to-night, and they have been
trying to scare you so as you
will stay in the house and not
bother them. I am one of the
gang, but have got religgion
and wish to quit it and lead
an honest life again, and will
betray the helish design. They
will sneak down from northards,
along the fence, at midnight
exact, with a false key, and
go in the nigger's cabin to get
him. I am to be off a piece and
blow a tin horn if I see any
danger; but stead of that I will
BA like a sheep soon as they
get in and not blow at all; then
whilst they are getting his chains
loose, you slip there and lock
them in, and can kill them at
your leasure. Don't do anything
but just the way I am telling
you; if you do they will suspicion
something and raise whoop-jamboreehoo.
I do not wish any reward but
to know I have done the right
thing. UNKNOWN FRIEND.
|